pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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