Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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