can we get nightvision for the apartment?
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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