oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
His nipple licking is glorious
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