are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
