come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
