just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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