She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
