so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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