I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Randomize
