I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
