i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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