Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize