then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
