i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
