I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
