how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Randomize
