Christians are straight up FREAKS
The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
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