My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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