He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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