She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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