I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
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