One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
