Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Randomize
