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he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
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