I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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