...so i touched it.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize