Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Randomize
