Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize