All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
