how can u be prego again
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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