You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize