I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
