I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Randomize