Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
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