The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
3 2 1 whiskey
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Randomize
