I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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