We should be called the Road Head Warriors
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
