Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize
