Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Randomize