did you get engaged???
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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