Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize
