Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I don't deserve a penis
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Randomize
