I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
