It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
