I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
