did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize
