I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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