and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize