do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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