He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
