thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
